019 Living as a Therapist wth Low-Vision with Jon Weaver LCSW
In today's episode, I am joined by Jon Weaver, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker based in New York who is navigating his own journey with retinitis pigmentosa. Jon brings a unique dual perspective to our conversation, blending his professional expertise in mental health with his lived experience of progressive vision loss. We explore his path from a surprising diagnosis to managing the "mental load" of disability while maintaining a fulfilling career. Join us as we discuss the intersection of clinical tools and the raw, human reality of adapting to a changing visual world.
Moving the Players on the Chessboard
As a psychotherapist, I often talk about the importance of "holding space" for grief. But as I sat across from Jon Weaver—a fellow clinician who is also navigating the progressive nature of Retinitis Pigmentosa—I was reminded that holding space for oneself is often the hardest task of all. Our conversation was a profound look into the dual life of a "blind therapist": the person who knows exactly what the textbooks say about adjustment, but who still has to face the "surreal" and "scary" reality of an intensive eye exam and a life-changing diagnosis.
One of the most striking parts of Jon’s story was his description of the "rationalization" phase. He spoke about noticing his fiancee walking through a dark room and jokingly attributing it to her having "superpowers" rather than acknowledging his own declining night vision. We’ve all been there. It is a protective mechanism—a way to keep the "plan" for our lives intact for just a little while longer. But as Jon noted, that rationalization eventually meets a "critical moment". For him, it was walking into a person at a gas station because his eyes couldn't adapt quickly enough to the change in light.
In my practice, I see how these moments carry so much more than just social awkwardness; they carry the weight of an identity in flux. Jon was incredibly candid about the depression that follows these moments, the "waves" of feeling like he might never have fun again or that his career was at risk. It is a series of "mini-crises," not a single event, and each one requires a new round of grieving and adjustment.
What I found most empowering was Jon’s approach to reclaiming his mental energy. He spoke about the "mental load"—the sheer exhaustion of hyper-focusing on every flash of light or missed stoplight. To combat this, he uses the "CBT triangle" of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. As a "Pokemon kid" and a gamer, he visualizes these as players on a chessboard or "EV training". He reminds us that while we can’t always control the "players" (our automatic negative thoughts or the physical decline of our vision), we have the power to move them.
We also discussed the "little wins" in the grieving process. For Jon, a win is as simple as allowing a painful thought—like missing his motorcycle—to enter his mind without letting it trigger a full anxiety cycle. It’s about "practicing what we preach" and treating ourselves with the same golden-rule compassion we extend to our clients.
As we wrapped up, Jon shared something that I hope stays with every listener: the idea that our passions don't have to disappear, they just have to "look" different. Whether it’s moving from first-person shooters to tactical RPGs like Baldur's Gate 3 or finding a new way to garden or cook, there is a "resurgence" available to us if we are willing to be creative and ask for help.
Jon’s journey reminds us that vision loss is a spectrum, and so is the healing that follows. We may not have a "cure" to turn off the progression yet, but we have the tools to ensure it doesn't turn off our lives.
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How do you continue to hold space for others’ mental health when your own world is fundamentally changing? In this episode, Matthew Reeves sits down with Jon Weaver, an LCSW living with retinitis pigmentosa (RP), to discuss the profound emotional and psychological shifts that accompany progressive vision loss. Jon shares his personal "backstory," from noticing flashes of light in grad school to the "surreal" experience of being the youngest person in a retina specialist's waiting room.
The heart of this discussion centers on the "mental load" of disability—the exhaustion that comes from hyper-focusing on symptoms and the anxiety of losing one's independence. Jon explains how he initially used "rationalization" to explain away his symptoms, such as joking that his fiancee simply had "night vision" superpowers. He provides a candid look at the grieving process, specifically the heartbreak of giving up his motorcycle and the "exposure therapy" required to accept a new way of living.
Listeners will gain practical mental health tools as Jon breaks down Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) through a unique lens. Whether you are a fellow clinician, someone newly diagnosed, or a long-term member of the low-vision community, Jon’s insights on "practicing what you preach" offer a grounded, hopeful roadmap for navigating the plateaus and declines of vision loss with grace.
Topics Covered: Retinitis pigmentosa diagnosis, Stargardt's disease, family history of vision loss, the "mental load" of disability, anxiety and hyper-fixation, grieving the loss of driving, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) triangle, grounding techniques, adaptive gaming and hobbies, the future of AR and AI in low vision.
Contact Jon at jonathanweaverlcsw@gmail.com or (585) 310-4170.
ABOUT THE PODCAST
inSight Out is your podcast home for living well with vision loss. Host Matthew Reeves (LPC CRC NCC) is a legally-blind psychotherapist and rehabilitation counselor specializing in helping people thrive while living with disability. Matthew is licensed in Georgia and is a nationally certified rehabilitation counselor.
Please be sure to subscribe to catch every episode. And remember to share the show with others in the blind and low-vision community!
CONNECT WITH US
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©Integral Mental Health Services, LLC
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The following transcript is AI generated and likely contains errors.
019 Living as a Therapist wth Low Vision with Jon Weaver LCSW
COLD OPEN
[00:00:00]
Jon Weaver: and she was really helpful in getting me to realize that giving, thinking myself into a crisis pulls me away from the day. And I didn't realize like how many bad days I was giving myself in a row.
And the hard part is learning how to allow those thoughts to come in, sit with them for a little bit and then let them go. And that's as, as therapists, I'm sure you do this as well, this is a primary focus of like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and like allowing ourselves to do that. So I really had to like sit down and force myself to practice what I preach,
INTRO
Matthew Reeves: You're listening to Insight Out a podcast about living well with low vision. Maybe you're feeling [00:01:00] confused, scared, isolated, or disheartened about a recent vision loss diagnosis, or maybe you've been managing your vision loss for a while and now you want to hear from others about how to continue growing and thriving. Insight Out is your supportive space to find healthy and impactful tools to build and maintain a truly rich and gratifying life with low or no vision.
I'm Matthew Reeves. I'm a legally blind psychotherapist and rehabilitation counselor. I specialize in helping people adjust to disability through my practice, integral Mental Health Services in Atlanta, Georgia. I'm really glad you're listening.
Please subscribe so you don't miss an episode, and let others in the low vision community know about the podcast so the word can spread to those who might find it helpful. And now on with today's discussion.
TOPIC INTRO
in today's episode, I'm joined by John Weaver, a licensed clinical social worker based in New York, [00:02:00] who's managing his own journey with retinitis pigmentosa. John brings a unique dual perspective to our conversation, blending his professional expertise and mental health with the lived experience of progressive vision loss.
We explore his path from a surprising diagnosis to managing the mental load of disability while maintaining a fulfilling career. Join us as we discuss the intersection of clinical tools and the raw human reality of adapting to a changing visual world.
INTERVIEW
Matthew Reeves: john, I appreciate you joining me for Insight Out today. Uh, you are a, um, licensed clinical social worker working out of New York and living with retinitis pigmentosa and I, so I always find it interesting to talk to other people who in the mental health field because I think, um. We have unusual, sometimes maybe unique perspective on the vision loss [00:03:00] journey. So I'm,
Jon Weaver: Hmm.
Matthew Reeves: happy to talk to you today. Can you give our audience a bit of a, a backstory on, on your vision loss journey? I.
Jon Weaver: Um, well first I just wanna say I'm very happy to be here. Um, this is the first podcast I've ever. Are done first time ever doing something like this. So I'm really glad for the opportunity. Um, so, uh, when I, when I was a kid, I always had like this perception that like I could potentially have something going on with my vision.
Um, I've got a long family history of visual impairments. My, um, grandfather, um, he has Stargardt's disease. Well, he, um, had macular degeneration, but I do believe he had Stargardt's disease, um, primarily. Um, and when I, um, first started to kind of put together what blindness actually was and like what the spectrum of blindness was, it was when I was around like eight or nine years old.
Um, my grandfather was really, really good at [00:04:00] pretending that he could see even though, but when I was like eight or nine, that's when I kind of learned that like, wait a minute. He can't really see the things that I would say to him. Um. And he started losing his vision when he was like in his forties, which, um, I don't know if that's like typical, um, for star guard's disease, but I do think that he was probably losing it from birth.
But, um, it starts to become more prevalent in his forties. And then my father ended up having the same situation happen to him where he started to have, um. Um, like early macular degeneration symptoms and he ended up receiving a diagnosis when he was in his, like mid thirties and he was told that he has, um, had star guard's disease.
And then, um, that's why it was a little bit strange for me because, um, I first started experiencing some difficulties with my vision. Um, prob probably in like my mid early [00:05:00] twenties. Um, I'm 33 now. Um, but. I first started to like really, really recognize that there was some sort of issue happening in about 2018 when I started grad school.
Um, back then I started to have like these random, like little like flashes of light happening in my vision and, um, it's really, really hard to explain what it looks like to people. Um, and I think that's something that I. Run into a lot with, when I talk to anybody about like, the spectrum of blindness and the difficulties that we have.
'cause, uh, like I can still see, but people don't, they, there's this assumption that like, 'cause my, my, uh, nephew does this, has done this sometimes to me where we would talk about it and he'd be like, he'd like hold up his fingers and be like, how many, how many do you see? And I could see him literally anywhere and I'd be like, wow, you're holding up two.
And that's not how blindness works.
Matthew Reeves: I passed
Jon Weaver: Um.
Matthew Reeves: and that test is. Of it.
Jon Weaver: Yes. [00:06:00] Um, so it, it kind of, when, when I was in grad school, I obviously, I was focusing on, um. School, but at this time I was having random flashes where I'd, it was usually like when I wake up in the morning or when I was like laying down for bed or things like that. Or sometimes going from one light source to another light source.
Um, and, um, I really kind of like slowly progressed. Um, so that kind of, I first started noticing that in 2018. And then, uh, when I graduated, um, it was 2020 and obviously COVID was happening, so I was just gonna. Staying inside for about a whole year, just working from home. Um, and a big part of that time was my vision kind of, uh, was relatively like, I didn't notice that I had any like, tunneling happening, but the flashing and has really was kind of like continuing and kept like ramping up.
And I noticed this was happening when I was like [00:07:00] on my computer for an extended period of time. Um, I wasn't doing any, um. Um, of my like little tricks that I do now with my computer. Like I use night mode and, um, I have like high contrast on and, um, I would have start having some difficulty with like, tracking things and, um, seeing things.
I'm a big video game person and, um, I used to love first person shooters and, uh, at the time I remember Halo Infinite came out and I, you know, as I'm in my mid. Th I'm 33 now, so clearly I was part of the halo generation and, uh, I, uh, was playing and I was like doing pretty okay. 'cause I've always been something that was a game that I was usually pretty good at.
But I started to like lose my skills and I was like, well, I'm getting older and I'm not as good as the young kids anymore. And I was like, always trying to find some type of explanation for why.
Matthew Reeves: any thought in the back of your head? Oh, this might [00:08:00] be about my vision.
Jon Weaver: Uh, at that time, no. Um, I was like, um, well I was always trying to like, rationalize something because, 'cause I was thinking that like, if something were to happen, it wouldn't be until I was like in my forties 'cause of like my family history
Matthew Reeves: Right.
Jon Weaver: uh.
Matthew Reeves: So even the flashes and the symptoms you, you were experiencing, that wasn't enough to get you concerned. It was just a thing that was happening.
Jon Weaver: Yeah, it was just like, they were, they were really random and they weren't like,
Matthew Reeves: I.
Jon Weaver: they weren't like super, like debilitating at the time. They weren't like really, really affecting my day-to-day functioning. Um, and it wasn't, it wasn't until, um, I started dating my fiance that I started to realize like, wait a minute.
There was something else happening. Uh, because she would just like get up at night without the lights on and like could just like walk around and do stuff in a dark room and like, I didn't, I was, [00:09:00] it, it's hard about reida. Pigmentosa is, and this is, I guess my experience is you, I don't know that you're like losing something because your brain is like constantly trying to adapt.
To it. And I didn't really put together that like I was having, starting to have a harder time seeing in the dark or like low light because it's like such a gradual decline. Um, but so Gloria, um, she's my fiance. Uh, I used to, we, I would make jokes at the time. I was like, oh, she has night vision and like I just.
She can see in the dark and like, I just can't see in the dark. And I was like making all these jokes like, well, I'm just normal. And she has this like, random superpower.
Matthew Reeves: Right. It's not that. It's not that I have a problem, it's that she is exceptional.
Jon Weaver: Yeah. And I just kept, I kept like doing that type of like, rationalization in my head. Um, because again, I wasn't really thinking about it. And, um. [00:10:00] And things kind of continued on. And at the time I was working at an agency, um, in the Rochester area where I was working with kids and I was a in-home therapist.
So, uh, with somebody with a visual impairment, being an in-home therapist was a pretty interesting job. 'cause I was driving all over the place every day and I was like meeting with people in their house. And obviously when I was like. Working with kids, we would do things outside like play with a Frisbee sometimes.
Like we would do some type of like outdoor activities, like we would go for walks and things like this. And, um, I used to like play catch with the kids a lot. I had like, um, I carried a softball and baseball gloves in my car just in case. 'cause it was always a great way to start talking.
Matthew Reeves: Right.
Jon Weaver: But, uh, I started, I think this was in 2021.
Like halfway through 2021, I started to develop this like severe flinching response. Whenever like something was like thrown at me or something like the ball. And I would like, [00:11:00] I started to realize like I had a harder time like playing catch, like I would like just miss the ball. Or like, there were times where like the kids would just like throw the ball and it would just like hit me in the chest and I was like, okay, there's might be something happening.
Here. Um, and I, I usually was getting new glasses every two years, um, at this time. So, um, I went in and I just so happened to go into Visionworks to get a new pair of glasses and they took a, uh, a look at my eyes. They did like a scan and I obviously, every time I did, did this, I told them that I have like a family history of like visual impairments and like, I also have, like on my grandmother's side, there was like glaucoma as well.
So I always wrote that down on like the form that they give you.
Matthew Reeves: Right.
Jon Weaver: um, it was, I think it was June, 2021 when I went to Visionworks and the doctor who like took a look in my eyes was like, well, there's something happening here. [00:12:00] Um, because he saw some, like discoloration on the back of my retina. Um, and he was like, don't worry about it.
We're just, I just want you to be checked out by somebody else and we'll see what happens. Um, and then I was like linked with, they set up an appointment with me with a retina specialist. Um, and uh, that was a very strange experience my first time going there, um, because I was like young and everybody else there was like elderly with walkers and all of this stuff.
So it felt like a really weird, surreal thing. And I.
Matthew Reeves: are is in your mind, are you starting to go, okay, this might have to do with family history. This might be my grandfather, my father. Like, are
Jon Weaver: Oh,
Matthew Reeves: to get concerned at this point?
Jon Weaver: oh yeah. I think I, I went through a little bit of a mini life crisis there, um, at the time because I was like, wait a minute. Okay. Something, something could be happening. And, [00:13:00] um, you know, I. Uh, I have, I have a history. So at the time I was like, well, if I'm losing my vision, I used to ride motorcycles when I was younger, so I was like, if I'm losing my vision now, I need to get a motorcycle so I can ride a motorcycle for a while.
And, uh, that was like a big, uh, moment for me because I was like, well, I gotta do it while I can. Um, so I did end up purchasing a motorcycle, which, you know, I had, was able to have for not too too long, about two years. But we'll, we, we get, we'll get there later,
Matthew Reeves: Okay.
Jon Weaver: but, but, uh, the first, the first time I went to, uh, the retina doctor, they did all the scans and I ended up being there for I think like three and a half hours.
It was like a really, really long period of time. They like super dilate your eyes and like it's actually going through that whole process. Like really scary and overwhelming. Like I, I remember they did four or five different kinds of tests. They like injected dye into my eyes and, um, they were doing [00:14:00] like, uh, they did like an EKG of my eye.
And um, I ended up having to do a, uh, genetic testing at that time. 'cause there, the agency was linked with, uh, the University of Rochester, which is a major hospital. Um, here and, uh, they were doing like free genetic counseling at that time. So, um, I did the swab and then they kind of looked at my eyes and the guy, my retina specialist was like, well, it looks like there's something happening, but we don't know what's happening.
Um, so, but we're gonna just continue to monitor and we're gonna see, see how this plays out. Which I, um, at the time, obviously after that appointment, I. Went home and immediately went to Reddit to try to find, uh, what to do. 'cause that's where the greatest minds are. Um, and I was going down like macular degeneration, star guard's disease.
I was looking at like diabetic [00:15:00] retinopathy. I was looking at like retinitis pigmentosa and I was really, really thinking that it was more so, um, star guard's disease or something associated with macular degeneration. But I wasn't having. Um, any difficulty with like my center vision. Um, it was my mid peripheral vision that I was starting to notice some challenges.
And when I, and when I first started researching that, I realized like, well, wait a minute. The flashing is a problem and this has been a problem for quite some time. Um, and um, also like as, as I was going to the retina specialist like that, like three month waiting period, I was like. Like kind of going through a very intense episode of anxiety.
Um, obviously 'cause I was like, oh my gosh, something's wrong with me. And I think that that's a somewhat of a universal experience that people with vision loss have. It's like the, so easily we go down that rabbit hole of like, I'm gonna [00:16:00] compare myself to everybody else and like, reading everybody else's like testimonies and reading other people's like experiences and, and through that like.
A crisis moment, I realized like, wait a minute. I, I think that this is, IM macular degeneration. I think it's, uh, retinitis pigmentosa. 'cause my center vision was always fine. Um, and it's, uh, it was a weird experience and they scheduled, uh, they scheduled an appointment out a year later and they told me to come back in a year and that we were gonna continue to monitor this.
And, um, over the next, um, six months, I, I guess my. Vision degradation was increasing when I was like first going to the retina specialist and things like this. And I also think that there was a a point where because I was in a heightened anxiety state, I was like hyperfocused on my vision at all times. I was like constantly thinking about it and like there was like [00:17:00] a big mental load that I was just.
Focusing on all of these little, little steps and all of these little things. And I was starting to like track like every single time I was like having like flashes of light in my vision. And obviously I went to, was, went to graduate school and um, because I work, uh, well, I am very big on medical research and research in general, so I was reading like.
All of these various studies and I was trying to like, educate myself as much as I could on like the eye, what each one of these are, what it means, and like the complexities of the diagnosis. And, um, so my symptoms were certainly increasing. And, um, after my first appointment, I ended up calling them and let them know that like I'm beginning to recognize I have like tunneling occurring in my vision.
Um. And like there was, I started to put together that there were parts of my vision where like if I put my hands up, I couldn't see my hands [00:18:00] anymore.
Matthew Reeves: So
Jon Weaver: Um,
Matthew Reeves: Notice the things that they were looking for. You figured out what would be helpful for them to make a diagnosis and you were
Jon Weaver: mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: okay. Gotcha.
Jon Weaver: And I, and I think it's because I was just, was all fueled by like my anxiety and I was very, very introspective at this time. And I remember I would like write down how many times in my phone I was like experiencing flashing. And like times when I was driving, um, I was like really, really fixated on like if I'm missing something or like if I was missing like, um.
Um, stoplights, for example, like where they would like go from bread to green and I would like be looking forward, but like the person behind me would honk. So I know that sounds really scary, but at the time I, I didn't really recognize it as like a significant, like a, like a problem. I just thought that like people were impatient.
So again, this, this was that rationalization
Matthew Reeves: Right, right.
Jon Weaver: and [00:19:00] um, and when I went back to. Um, 'cause I called and let them know that like this was happening and I'm starting to have more flashing and I, I'm starting to recognize, um, I'm having like tunneling happen in my vision and I'm starting to have a little bit more difficulty.
And I started to talk more about, 'cause when I first went to the retina doctor, I didn't even talk about like, my difficulty at nighttime, like in a dark room. And then, uh. So I talked about that with them, and I tried to schedule an appointment and they were like, okay, we'll get you in. It's gonna be three months.
And then like two hours later, I got a call from a nurse from them and I was like, well, okay. Hey, hi. How's it going? And they were like, so what's, what's really happening? And then I kind of gave them the rundown and they're like, oh, we're gonna, we're gonna get you in as soon as we can. And they, she was like, could you come in next week?
And I was like, oh. Yeah, I could. That's, that's exciting. And, and again, they were like very re reassuring with me. They were like, it's just, we're just going to check it out. We're [00:20:00] just gonna see what's happening. Um, I, it sounds like we've had a little bit of an escalation. Don't worry about it. And obviously I'm an anxious person, so I immediately had a little bit of an additional crisis.
Um.
Matthew Reeves: that reassurance was not very reassuring.
Jon Weaver: No, no. Especially when they were like, oh, come in, come in three months. But, and then it was a call from a different person. Like, no, no, no, you need to come in next week. Uh, and the, the appointment I remember it was a, I'll never forget, it was a Thursday that she called me and she's like, we're gonna get you in.
We have a, we have you set up for an appointment Monday at 9:00 AM And I was like, oh, okay. That's pretty quick 'cause.
Matthew Reeves: saying this is not an emergency. You stay calm, but they're acting as if this is a very big deal.
Jon Weaver: Yeah. Which, you know, to an anxious person, it's probably not the best way to handle that situation. It's so
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: when I, when I went in for the appointment, um, they went through the whole gambit of tests again. Um, and I ended up being there for, again, like three [00:21:00] hours of testing. Um, they injected the dye in my eyes again.
They ended up doing. All of these other like, exam, uh, other exams that like I didn't do previously. Um, and the, the equipment that they used was really, really, um, very, very different from the first time. Um, and at this time they actually had me do a visual field test,
Matthew Reeves: I
Jon Weaver: um, which, um, that by far is the worst experience I had doing a machine thing.
'cause my head was like. Strapped into this thing, kind of, it felt like, and they put like the little, like circle around your eye. It felt like a clockwork orange situation.
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: Um, and uh, the lady who did it, um, because I was with, uh, I came with Gloria and the lady who did it, she was like, who, how'd you get here right at the end of my, and I thought that that was a strange question to hear.
[00:22:00] From somebody. And I said that I came with my girlfriend at the time and they were like, oh, okay. And we'll just, we'll let the, the doctor see after. Um, so, uh, and then I went back to the waiting room and I told Gloria how it went and I was like, I don't think that went too. I don't think that went well.
But shortly after that, the retina doctor, uh, he came in, he took me back and then, uh, he like went over some pictures of my eyes and he let me know that, um. I've developed bony spics in the back of my eyes and he said that we have, um, I think we have substantial evidence to do a retinitis pigmentosa diagnosis.
And again, he was also like really reassuring. He's like, don't worry, we're gonna continue to monitor this and we're gonna figure out the plan and all of this type of stuff. And this is when I also got the information for my, um, genetic tech. Stain. And I do gotta say, I find it, I find it very, uh, [00:23:00] interesting in the, uh, visually impaired community that like we, we know our genes and we,
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: we like Oh.
And like finding people, other, other people that have like our same genes. It's uh, it's very interesting process 'cause I don't think,
Matthew Reeves: four.
Jon Weaver: yeah. And, uh, and it's a, it's a, it's a really, really.
Matthew Reeves: Mm-hmm.
Jon Weaver: it's a nice and reassuring experience I have to say. But, um, he let me know at the time that I have, uh, P Rph two as my dominant pathogenic gene, and I also have a B, C, A four As, which is a gene that's associated with Stargardt's disease.
Um, and I have both of these. And, um, through that he said that like, we're the primary dominant gene. Currently is the PPH two 'cause that's causing the mid peripheral loss. Um, [00:24:00] and on the, uh, visual field test that I completed, I, um, have a ring. My vision, it kind of looks like a donut where I have like a, a circle of like difficulty in both of my eyes, but the very far peripheral I can see, which is, uh.
It's,
Matthew Reeves: like a, uh, a hybrid of RP and Storet.
Jon Weaver: yeah, it's a, it's a little bit of a weird, uh, thing and my, uh, retina doctor did tell me, he's like, well, you kind of have like a, a little bit of a special presentation. And I was like, oh, well that's nice to hear that. I guess I'm, I'm important somewhat. Um, um. And, uh, he let me know that there's a chance that later on in my life I can develop macular degeneration because of this.
Um, and he also gave me a lot of like, education on how there's a potential to, um, lose my center vision. And I [00:25:00] think that this is, this is very common with people with retinitis pigmentosa that eventually over time you, you lose more and more of your rod cells, the cone cells begin to be affected as well.
Um, which,
Matthew Reeves: this is all still happening while you're in grad school learning all
Jon Weaver: oh, no, no, sorry, sorry. I graduated in 2020, so this was like right after I did all my schooling and I'm like, oh, now I can finally just go to work.
Matthew Reeves: Did you, did training and your experience in the mental health field, like impact how you received this news or how you were responding to it?
Jon Weaver: Oh, 100%. I was, I, I think it's very, very common for us to kind of have a series of existential existential crisises. Um, and I've, I've certainly have been able to identify that, like vision loss and receiving a diagnosis is. A series of [00:26:00] crisis, and it's also a series of grief episodes constantly. Um, and prior to this I was al I've always been an individual who has, uh, pretty high anxiety and obsessional thinking at times where like I'll sometimes get stuck and hyper fixated on things.
Um, and certainly am on the A DHD spectrum as well with my hyper fixations. And, um, during that time. Retinitis pigmentosa became a strong hyper fixation for me. And I, that's why I would, I was spending pretty much all of my time that it wasn't working, dedicated to like, researching things and reading, um, like various, like potential treatments and like I was watching lectures online of like, uh, medical school lectures to try to learn more about like the structure of the eyes and trying to find what I could.
Due to, um, prevent things from getting worse or to [00:27:00] stop it. And, um, the hard part is we've, especially with, with all types of vision, um, we're not there yet. We're not, we're, we haven't figured out how to turn it off and to stop it.
Matthew Reeves: It must have been especially difficult for somebody with dealing with anxiety and, and some of those hyper fixations to, to be in a place of saying, look, the, the mechanism I have to. Adjust to this, to tolerate this, to cope with this is to learn,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: yet all the learning didn't actually result in much that's useful even despite all that effort.
Jon Weaver: Oh yes. I, I, I went, I took this way, way, way, way, way too far. I was reading, I was like translating research articles from German to English and I was like reading about like, um, genetic studies that they were conducting with stem cells in India. And I was reading like in South Korea and I was reading [00:28:00] things from like China and like what they were researching 'cause.
And the, the conclusions were all about the same. That like, we don't know how to do it, we don't know how to stop it. We have ideas how to stop it and we're trying some things, but there. There's no def definite cure, and I know that there are like prospective, um, treatments out there right now. Like I've, and because of this I've, I've applied to Ogen, OCU 400 I, every time they've done openings for their treatments or for their, um, like clinical trials.
I applied to every single agency that was doing this in the United States. And, uh, they all were telling me, uh, that, well, we can't do it right now. But they were really, really, what's, what's comforting, I guess, was they were like, well, your vision's not bad enough right now because your, uh, visual field [00:29:00] test is your BCVA.
So my best corrected visual acuity was still 2020 with glasses, but if it was worse than 2020, then I would be meet the threshold. And, um, well the hard part about Red Knight's pigmentosa is. I'm probably gonna have 2020 vision from that test well into my forties. And even if I were to try, like probably even into my fifties, I would probably have 2020 vision with corrective glasses
Matthew Reeves: Right, because
Jon Weaver: small, small sections.
Matthew Reeves: very small sections of your field. Yeah. It's not
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: the full picture.
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: So the, the research, that's a form of self-advocacy. I mean,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: sounds like for you, it, it maybe went further than was useful,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: but it ultimately didn't, didn't help that much, uh,
Jon Weaver: No.
Matthew Reeves: what, what did you discover, um, after that?
What was the next way that you tried to come to terms with this?
Jon Weaver: Oh, I [00:30:00] certainly tried to play, pretend for a while. Um, and it was about two years of me. Pretending that nothing was wrong, um, even though things were continuing to degrade. Um, and it's, it's weird that, um, vision loss isn't a super gradual moment. It's stages and plateaus. And there was an, there was a time, I believe this was in 20, right after I received the diagnosis, where I was at about a plateau for about eight or nine months where things kind of stayed the same.
And then. Mm, I experienced a significant decline in, um, like mid 20, 23 to 2024. That's when, um, the flashes of light in my vision greatly increased. Um, I started to be much more salient in my ability to recognize like, okay, there's, there's a [00:31:00] problem happening. Um, and I started to like have more. Um, like quote unquote, like blind moments where I would like go from one light setting to another light setting.
I would like walk in, um, I would see someone, like, people would just like, walk in front of me and I would like, I started to like not see them until they're directly in front of me. Um, and there's, I have like the, there's a series of like critical moments I think that each, every, all of us experience. And one of those moments was when I.
Was working and I was driving at the time to like people's houses, uh, to meet with clients. And I opened the door to a gas station 'cause I wanted to get another cup of coffee. And I opened the door and I walked right in and there was a person standing behind the door and I did not see them because my eyes didn't like refresh.
And it was really, really bright outside and it was like really dark on the inside. And I just walked right into this person. And uh, that was a [00:32:00] moment where I literally ended up. It was not a good day. I ended up calling and canceling my sessions for that day because I was like, wait a minute. I just walked into somebody and I just need to go home and
Matthew Reeves: was way more than just an awkward social moment that that carried a lot of emotional weight for you.
Jon Weaver: Oh, yeah. And I, throughout all of this, I, I was experiencing like, uh, strong like waves of depression and I was like. Struggling with like the questions about like, well, my future, what am I gonna do in the future? And like the I the idea of like being somebody with a visual impairment, like I was like, that's not gonna be me.
And I think a lot of that like was fueling even more of the anxiety that I felt and I wasn't coming to terms and like accepting the fact that like, this is my circumstances. Um, and I think that's the, uh. From what I've found talking to other people with rp, it's a similar experience that 'cause it, [00:33:00] we then, the presentation that I have, like the, the typical presentation doesn't start until you're in your like late twenties and late twenties, early thirties.
And it's like, we have like this set plan, like I did, I finished school and like I was just, I can go to work now and I can like move forward with like my other goals. And then I got this, this thing thrown at me where I was like, well. You are not gonna be able to see as good as you used to. Um, and I believe it's a very, very natural experience to have that wave of depression come in.
Matthew Reeves: your experience is different than mine. I think that's really, you're highlighting something that. I think it's interesting that, there's pros and cons,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: diagnosed early versus being diagnosed at different points in life later or whatever. Whenever, you, it was after you had done your training, after you had invested in your career, after like getting a master's degree to do this job, then you got thrown the curve ball.
For me, I, [00:34:00] I knew from a very young age. What was available to me and what was, what maybe wasn't available to me. Uh, and I was, and I was fortunately shepherded through that process by my parents. but when you did get this diagnosis and, and you bumped into the man of the gas station and it was getting real, when it was really getting real for you. Did that, was there, was there anticipatory loss in other, in other words, that's a technical term, but w
Jon Weaver: No, I understand.
Matthew Reeves: of, oh wow, these things that I've invested in, that I've really applied myself towards and the the dreams I've got and where I want to go, did that feel like it was at risk?
Jon Weaver: Oh, 100, 100%. There were, there were days where I was like, I can't be a therapist because I'm gonna be a blind person. And I'm like, looking back on that now, I'm like, Johnny, what are you, what are you thinking? Like, this is like a best case scenario, situation. You can go to work and like use a computer, but like I, I think that.
The [00:35:00] anxiety and the fear drives irrational thinking. And we, we just went, and this is a universal aspect of humanity. Like we, we can think ourselves into a, an existential crisis. And I was, I was thinking that like I'm, I wasn't gonna be able to. Drive anymore. I wasn't gonna be able to like do anything. I wasn't gonna be able to ride my motorcycle anymore.
I wasn't gonna be able to just go for walks outside without having a hard time. Like I was gonna have to learn how to like, use a cane. And I was like, this is like, this is, this just wasn't my plan. And um, when I talk about it, like now looking back on that, I'm like, it's just such an inappropriate waste of my time to.
Dedicate all of this energy into the fixation on like, oh, these are just the perceived losses. And it kept pulling me away from what the day to day experience is like. I was, I was dedicating so much of my time [00:36:00] every day thinking about how bad things are, and like, it stopped me from realizing like, well man, I'm, I'm doing great today.
I'm able to be there today and I'm still able to get out and go for walks and like cook stuff outside and like do like I could grill and like I could like go for walks and like I can still ride my motorcycle for a period of time. And I was like, I, there was, there was a big moment and Gloria was a very, very critical support and I'm very thankful 'cause she's also a therapist, so
Matthew Reeves: Yeah, very
Jon Weaver: we are.
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: Uh, two therapists so we can really, really focus on, um, what's happening together and kind of working through everything. And she was really helpful in getting me to realize that giving, thinking myself into a crisis pulls me away from the day. And I didn't realize like how many bad days I was giving myself in a row.
And the hard part is [00:37:00] learning how to. Allow those thoughts to come in, sit with them for a little bit and then let them go. And that's as, as therapists, I'm sure you do this as well, this is a primary focus of like cognitive behavioral therapy and like allowing ourselves to do that. So I really had to like sit down and force myself to practice what I preach, which.
Matthew Reeves: because otherwise fear of being able to enjoy a safe walk someday in the future robs you of the safe walk today that you
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: that you do have access to. and yet those thoughts. Also serve a purpose. They're, they're protective. They're, they're getting us to brace ourselves for something to come. the thought, the, the thoughts themselves are not bad. They're not villainous in our
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: but they also don't need to be in charge.
Jon Weaver: Yeah. And that, that's, it's a I, 'cause I, I love video games, so I like, I tend to think of things in terms of games where, [00:38:00] and I do this in my therapy practice where I'm like, well, I'm just playing a game with myself and I'll use like the CBT triangle to like, help me break down each, each of the players of the game and try to find, find ways to combat each other.
Matthew Reeves: And
Jon Weaver: Um.
Matthew Reeves: people may not know what that is, can you just briefly describe the the CBD triangle?
Jon Weaver: So cognitive behavioral therapy is, um, I explain it because, uh, I am in my thirties. I was born in the nineties, so I'm a Pokemon kid. Um, I explained it, I explain it to people. If I am. This is for the fellow video gamers out there. Cognitive variable therapy is the interaction between our thinking feelings and our behaviors.
Um. And I draw the triangle and I use it as EV training from Pokemon, where we can have a spike in thinking, which can lead to difficulty with our feelings. Like if we are thinking negative thoughts constantly, our feelings can become very, very, we can feel very low and very depressed, which can cause us to like lose our [00:39:00] motivation for behavior as a behavioral response.
Um, and the big driving factor is being able to slow down and recognize. How each one of those players are interacting. Um, and the primary focus of like all coping skills. Realistically, uh, when you look at like the foundational function of a coping skill, like deep breathing or like using any type of like cognitive tool, it's our ability to recognize how we're thinking, how we're feeling, and what we're doing.
And understanding that we have the power to change, to control how we're thinking, how we're feeling, and what we're doing, and we can move the players on the chess board. Um, and I think it's given me, this whole process has given me as a therapist so much like professional development because I've had to force myself to identifying like when I'm anxious.
What does my anxiety [00:40:00] cause me to do? And like, where am I on the spectrum of anxiety to depression right now? And how, how are both of these interacting together and, and how can I focus on transitioning my thinking to something more positive? Like do using, doing a gratitude practice to make myself feel a little bit better, to pull myself away from the negative thinking and then to gimme more energy to go get up and do something.
Um, and
Matthew Reeves: is that? How
Jon Weaver: I know that's a pretty, uh, pretty. Somewhat in depth explanation of something, but
Matthew Reeves: but it's the tool that's working for you.
Jon Weaver: mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: And, and I think, think for a lot of people that tool is effective. Uh, and, and do you, how do you help others? Like what tools do you give your clients or other people with, with, that are going through any challenge really.
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: Um, but, and, and we're here to talk about vision loss.
Um,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: tools do you find are effective for helping people who are having that crisis moment or who are on, uh, [00:41:00] somewhere on that spectrum with depression and anxiety?
Jon Weaver: Hmm. So I, I try, try my best to really tailor the tools to the specific situations. Um, and I do, um, provide people with like index cards in my physical therapy, well physical, like when I'm meeting with a, with a client for example. But, um, I do telehealth in my private practice, but I really focus on like tailoring each one of the.
Coping strategies. So like I will, I have do like a really big overview of like cognitive behavioral therapy. I draw the triangle and I draw a little person on the inside and I draw, like, there's like nu percentages for each one. So thinking feelings and behaviors. Um, and then I'll write on it like, where are you at?
Underneath that, um, to try to help people, uh, use this as a reminder to think like, where am I at? What am I thinking? What am I feeling, and what am I doing right now? And is this a pattern that's been repeating over and over and over again? Um, I am really big on grounding techniques and, and my [00:42:00] big thing for grounding techniques is sometimes just thinking about where, what are your, your toes doing in your shoes?
And like, wiggle your toes because it literally forces your brain to stop the ruminative rumination. Cycle and prioritize something outside of yourself. Like what are you feeling in the outside world? Um, and so I do like the 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 grounding exercise with people very, very frequently. Um, I really, really focus on, um, helping people to be more introspective.
That's my primary focus and I think vision loss is something that, uh, causes people to become very introspective to begin with. Because there is no break from it. There is no time where it goes away.
Matthew Reeves: Right.
Jon Weaver: something that you have to sit with and constantly adapt to. Um.
Matthew Reeves: And it's, it also it. In, in different ways for different people. It takes, [00:43:00] by definition, it's taking away our ability to perceive things on the outside and that leaves us with perceiving things on the inside. So, yeah, I think you're right. The vision loss does tend to promote introspection,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: is probably a valuable, that's something we can turn into something positive.
That's a turn. We can turn that into an asset.
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm. It's, but at the same time, human beings, it's like we're, it's like we're designed to tell ourselves the worst story possible. Um, and
Matthew Reeves: us.
Jon Weaver: I, it does. But I, a big part of like my therapy practice with all individuals, not so much like visually impaired people is like, treat yourself the way that you treat other people.
Matthew Reeves: Yes.
Jon Weaver: take the golden rule on a different aspect. Like, 'cause we will say, we will think things to ourselves that we will never for a second consider saying to somebody else.
Matthew Reeves: Right,
Jon Weaver: And we, not only do we think those negative things, we believe those negative things automatically.
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: [00:44:00] And, um. I'm very thankful that Gloria has been helpful, severely helpful in me kind of recognizing and understanding like this pattern that I was stuck in.
And it gives me a better understanding of like where people are in their like mental health journey and like where in their process of healing,
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: um, um
Matthew Reeves: I'm, I'm grateful you have that support as
Jon Weaver: mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: wish that for everybody, uh,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: have that support. Seek it out.
Jon Weaver: Yes.
Matthew Reeves: would be my, my advice from afar,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: to, is to seek out that support. If there's one behavior that you can activate, uh, that would be a good one, a good
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: uh, to find, find supportive systems.
'cause that's so, so crucial. You know, we've talked a lot about that cognitive behavioral therapy approach to kind of reframing thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. One, one thing that I'd love to hear your. Perspective on is how you help people through the [00:45:00] entirely natural human and normal experience of grief. Um, because you talked about how vision loss is a series of grieving episodes.
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: what, talk more about that.
Jon Weaver: So grief for my perception of it and like the way in which I kind of discuss it with people is something that it's a series of adaptions and acceptance phases, and it's something that it never really, really goes away. Our ability to manage and respond to the symptoms of grief become. Easier over time.
And if you really, really look at it from like a fundamental perspective, grief is an example of exposure therapy happening, uh, on a, on a daily basis. We, um, ha. Uh, so greet when we have like, uh, an example of like, we start to feel very, very negative about something, or like if we're thinking about like, oh, the loss of someone or like the loss of something, [00:46:00] our body has to naturally go through those emotions.
And every time that we have those like flareups or every time we have one of those episodes, our body has to work through that on an its individual base. Um, and I think conceptualizing it in this way can be very beneficial because it helps me specifically with like the loss of like my vision to, um, accept and adapt every day that, like, every day that I feel that it's a little bit different, but because I've went through it the first time, I can use those skills to better go through it the next time.
Um, I do think, like, I, I know that this, it sounds a little trite, but uh, my. The biggest, hardest moment for me with my vision loss was accepting that I can't drive my motorcycle anymore. And let me tell you, I pushed that really far. There, there were, there was times where I like, really should not have been riding my motorcycle at at the [00:47:00] end, but I was like, oh, I just gotta hold onto it.
And like the, the, because of where I live, like, um. Um, the sky is usually very, very gray here, which some people, uh, don't really like. But honestly, with retinitis pig, this is the greatest, uh, greatest gift I've ever received. Gray sky, oh my god, I can see so good. And uh,
Matthew Reeves: is easier for me too.
Jon Weaver: yeah, the bright, bright blue.
Everybody's like, oh yeah, it's great. It's fantastic. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I can't see anything on a bright blue day, it's horrible, but. Um, I guess accepting that I can no longer do it just devastated me, uh, because I loved, I loved riding my motorcycle. And another thing too that was really hard, like I, I used to play League of Legends with a lot of my friends and I just, I, I couldn't do it anymore.
'cause I can't, I can't track all of the things on the screen as much as I used to. And [00:48:00] both of these. Episodes are very, very similar because I had to go through a severe grieving process. I was like grieving the loss of my ability to do something, which that's a very, very common aspect with people with vision, visual impairments.
And then I was like grieving, like the loss of like fun. So I, and I was, I thought to myself into a crisis moment where I was like, well, I'm never, I'm just never gonna have fun again. Like, and it was all. An example of like me literally engaging in the cognitive distortions that we're, we're all trained as therapists.
Like this is, these are cognitive distortions. These are things that we have to like label and identify and like we have to work through them. And, and labeling and identifying didn't help me at all. I was like, yeah, I'm having a cognitive distortion. But yeah, it's, it's happening to me and it's real. Um, so in order for me to truly work through that and come to terms with it.
I had to just [00:49:00] allow it, allow it to come in every day. Like I would, I would think about my motorcycle all the time. And I used to watch like all these like YouTubers that would like ride motorcycles. And I was like, really, really into it. And like, I like kept watching that on YouTube all the time and I was like, well, I'm just like hurt, hurting myself.
'cause I was just making things worse And it's, it's such a delicate process. Too, because it's so, it's little. Little wins are how we get through it, not the big stages. It's like all of the little steps through the stages are what's gonna help us.
Matthew Reeves: What's an example of a little win in the grieving process?
Jon Weaver: Hmm. I think a very, very small little win is just allowing the thought to come into my brain and then not engaging with it in an anxious cycle. Like
Matthew Reeves: let it
Jon Weaver: the spring? Yeah. And in the springtime, for example, 'cause [00:50:00] right around March is when I would always like, for my motorcycle specifically, right around March is like, I'll take, I would, this is when I would like get my motorcycle out.
I'd do all my maintenance for the spring and I'd be like, ready to go. And it's like, these are the things that I think about. And then because of the YouTube algorithm, it knows to like give me, uh, motorcycle content on YouTube, which triggers me more. So I, I, and. It's allowing me and myself to see that and to feel that experience and not give it the negative energy.
Think of, and trying to shift my thinking more so to like, ah, that was a, that was a good time back then, you know, before and trying to help.
Matthew Reeves: of the thing
Jon Weaver: Yes. Yes.
Matthew Reeves: even if you've lost it, you had it, uh, and it
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: to you, and, and remembering the joy that it brought,
Jon Weaver: Yeah.
Matthew Reeves: while not being afraid of acknowledging and even embracing
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: that comes with the loss.
Jon Weaver: Definitely.
Matthew Reeves: that, that pain is like, I love [00:51:00] how you put that, the allowing the. painful feeling to arrive without it triggering an anxiety cycle. 'cause anxiety is a, is fear, anxiety is protection, anxiety is a protective, uh, experience. But the thought is not dangerous.
Jon Weaver: No.
Matthew Reeves: just doesn't know it.
Jon Weaver: Yeah.
Matthew Reeves: we treat our own thoughts as if they're dangerous. And now we have a battle going on inside of our head, which takes a huge amount of energy and doesn't, and doesn't really get us anywhere.
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: Yeah.
Jon Weaver: And I think a big, a huge part of vision visual impairments that I've, I've learned is like the overall mental load of it all day long. It's like everything was harder, especially when you first start. 'cause it's like I'm spending all of this mental energy. Thinking about things that I can't control or like going over and over and over in the same type of patterns of thinking.
And I would come home [00:52:00] at the end of the day after like meet a full day of work, and I would be like, I am just totally 100% spent. Like I am just completely exhausted. And that exhaustion was just thinking about myself. And I'm supposed to like prioritize in a work setting. Like I'm, I'm there for the people around me.
But I would question myself in session like, oh, well how long am I gonna be able to do this? And like, those are another example of the distorted thinking process. Um, it's, uh,
Matthew Reeves: we're. We're starting to come up on time. I wanna
Jon Weaver: mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: you, um, you know, you've, you've shared so much about your, your personal journey today. What, and I'm grateful for that. I know you're, you've kind of recently started your private practice in New York, and so you're seeing in New York over telehealth. Um, so we'll have contact information in the show notes, but
Jon Weaver: Nice.
Matthew Reeves: any, um. Are there any thoughts or things you'd like to share as, as we, as we wrap up that we maybe haven't touched [00:53:00] on, uh,
Jon Weaver: Um,
Matthew Reeves: be helpful for people listening?
Jon Weaver: well, I think the biggest thing is being open to trying something new. Um, I think. Uh, video games have always been my primary. Like, this is how I relax. Okay? And I went through stages of grief for like, I can't play shooter games anymore, but that doesn't mean I can't play video games anymore. I've had this like, major resurgence of like, trying new things and I, I, I've played like Expedition 33, my friend.
Um, Anthony was like, you should try this, and I did. And it was absolutely fantastic and it was something that I would never usually play. Or another one was like Baldy Gate three, like, these are new games that are, I would never even consider previously and I ended up having like, could be po some of the greatest experiences I've ever had.
And, um, it's the big, my big takeaway is don't let your visual impairment stop you from enjoying the things that you like. Okay. And we can always constantly try something new [00:54:00] and there's always something new to do. And,
Matthew Reeves: And I
Jon Weaver: um,
Matthew Reeves: you're describing that in terms, even in terms of games. Video games, you still play video games. It just doesn't look like it used to look.
Jon Weaver: yeah, every day I have to,
Matthew Reeves: and we
Jon Weaver: I
Matthew Reeves: travel. It just may not look the way it used to look. We can still garden it, it just may not look or cook or like whatever we love.
Jon Weaver: mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: are, I think the chances are really, really high. Especially if we, if we ask for help, um, we can continue to do the thing we love, even if it doesn't look the same,
Jon Weaver: Yeah.
Matthew Reeves: it used to. Um, but you're right, there's, there's that, that kind of initial phase where it feels like, well, if I can't do this in the way I've always done it, then I can't do it at all.
Um,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: That is a great way to lead to depression. So being aware
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: thought is coming in, um, and, and countering it and saying, hang on. may not know how to do this
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: a person with a vision impairment, but me get [00:55:00] creative. Let me ask for some help. Maybe
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: can help me, uh, come up with a different way.
Jon Weaver: Yeah,
Matthew Reeves: and that's, that's really valuable.
Jon Weaver: definitely. And I'm, I'm very, very excited for us in the future, people with visual impairment. I, I know that there's a lot of like doom and gloom, but I'm extremely excited about like, um, augmented reality glasses and like maximizing our available vision. And I'm very, very excited for like further, I know that it's the, uh, hot ticket item, but I'm excited about more integration of artificial intelligence to help us and to like be more adaptable in the moment and like help us better understand and like, see things and extend, provide us with more support on.
The vision that we still have. Um,
Matthew Reeves: tools are here and, and they are new and
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: perfect. Uh, and, but
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: better and we are not good yet at using them.
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: these are some big changes coming to our society and it's impacting those of us with vision [00:56:00] impairment in very specific ways,
Jon Weaver: Mm-hmm.
Matthew Reeves: but. This, these are new, these are brand new technologies.
Um, and like every technology is built on the ones before it, but they're new and. Of course we're not good at it. How could we
Jon Weaver: Yeah,
Matthew Reeves: Um, but we'll figure it out,
Jon Weaver: definitely.
Matthew Reeves: hopefully safely. Um, so, uh, I, I'm really grateful for your time today. Uh, John, it's it, thank you for sharing that. And if people want to get in touch with you, uh, your contact information will be in the show notes. Um, and thank you for the work you're doing and thank you for sharing your personal story with us.
Jon Weaver: Oh, thank you so much. And, uh, if you, if you ever want me to come back, I'm, I'm, I'll be here. Don't worry.
Matthew Reeves: Okay, great, great. Let me take up on that
Jon Weaver: All right. Thanks.
RECAP
My conversation with John really highlights how vision loss is not a single event, but a series of mini crises and grieving episodes that require constant adaptation. I was particularly moved by his [00:57:00] transparency regarding the rationalization we often use to hide our struggles from ourselves. His use of the CBT Triangle as a game to move players on a chess board is an effective, accessible way to reclaim agency when things feel out of control.
John reminds us that while our hobbies or work might not look the way they used to. They are still within our reach if we're willing to try something new. It's a powerful testament to the idea that we can still have a rich life, even if the plan has changed.
OUTRO
Matthew Reeves: Thanks for joining us for this episode of Insight Out. You are the reason this podcast exists and we'd love to hear from you. You can leave us a voice message at speakpipe.com/insightoutpod. That's [00:58:00] speakpipe.com/insightoutpod. There, you can share your thoughts about today's conversation, suggest a topic for a future episode, or tell us about your experience living with vision loss. Again, that's speakpipe.com/insightoutpod.
Insight Out is produced by Integral Mental Health Services, my private practice that offers psychotherapy for adults in Georgia and disability adjustment and chronic illness counseling nationwide. Visit us at integralmhs.com and you can visit insightoutpod.com to catch up on all the episodes and to find links for subscribing in all the major podcast apps. A video version of this podcast is available on YouTube. Search for the channel, using the handle @inSightOutPod. You can also find us on social media using that same handle. I hope you'll join us for the next [00:59:00] episode of inSight Out. Subscribe now in your favorite podcast app to stay connected. Thanks again for listening.